Tip #3/10: Don’t say I Love You!

Tip #3/10:  Don’t say I Love You!

Your Warm Up Your Relationship tip #3 is:  Don’t say I love you!

What?… I’m suggesting not to say I love you! to your partner?

I understand that might sound crazy, or at least counter-intuitive, but hear me out.

Here’s the thing…

Many of us say I love you! in the same way, we say See you soon, or Pass the salt.

The phrase becomes so mundane or robotic that it loses the depth of emotional meaning. Right?

My recommendation is that you not say I love you! for a day or two. 


I want you to say and do other things that express that you cherish, like, value, appreciate, respect, and adore your partner.

Mix it up! Get creative. Find new ways of letting your partner know that she’s special to you.

To help you out,  here are a few suggestions:

  • Gaze into her eyes like you did when you were first falling in love
  • Tell her how hot she looks in her outfit
  • Send her 12 heart emojis in a text
  • Cook her favorite meal and light some dinner candles
  • Give her a foot or back massage
  • Tell her: You’re my favorite person in the whole world because…
  • Share 3 specific things you’re grateful that she’s done
  • Go out of your way to do something nice for her
  • Write her a love letter 
  • Play your couple song (“Our song”) and dance with her in the living room

You get the idea!

If you’re like so many of the lesbian couples I work with, you’ve probably fallen into routines that don’t keep your expressions of love fresh or flowing.

You can change that today, with a little effort and creativity. And if you are in need of more help, please check out our FREE 30-minute masterclass: The 5 Steps My Lesbian Clients Take to Prevent a Breakup, Reconnect, and Build a Thriving Relationship (Without Wasting Years in Therapy)

Here’s a list of our past Tips to Warm Up Your Relationship