Sick and tired of feeling so-so in the relationship happiness department? How would it feel to become the happiest lesbian couple you know?
I’ll tell you— it will feel AWESOME!
Want to know how I can be so sure? Because my partner, Lisa, and I are the happiest couple I know. Our friends tell us that we have the happiest and best relationship they’ve ever seen.
I really want to help you become that happy, mentor couple in your circle.
Amping up on your couple happiness isn’t just a gift for you and your partner. It will actually have a positive impact on your entire circle of friends and the LGBTQ community as a whole.
For a long time I’ve been asking and observing what habits set happy couples apart from unhappy couples. And I’ve discovered some important ways that happy couples behave differently from their unhappy counterparts.
So, if you’re ready to become a happier couple, you’ve just got to start doing the things that’ll move your relationship in that direction.
You can’t think your way to becoming the happiest couple around. You’ll have to pull on your big-girl panties and get into some action.
By the way, a huge bonus is that by doing the things that build up the happiness in your relationship you will also increase your feelings of security and love.
Isn’t that what we all deeply long for? To feel secure and loved.
You and your sweetheart can create a relationship where you both feel deeply secure and loved. And very, very happy.
Do these things to become the happiest lesbian couple you know:
- Always put your relationship first
- Hug your partner at least twice a day (and hold it till you each relax)
- Laugh with your beloved— a lot!
- Accept that your girlfriend is going to be a pain in the ass sometimes
- Talk to each other about anything and everything
- Face the world (and problems) as a team
- Make sure you have good boundaries with other people
- Plan date night every week
- Never blame or shame your partner
- Discuss decisions until you come up with a win-win
- Every night, put each other to bed
- Negotiate your sex life in a way that feels good to both of you
- Learn how to fight fair
- Play together…and not just in bed
- Learn how to regulate your emotions when they get out of kilter
- Tame your anger dragon
- Focus on the positive instead of the negative
- Accept that you may always have a few things you’ll disagree on
- Talk about the hard stuff: money, spirituality, sex, in-laws
- If you’ve hurt your honey (even if you didn’t mean to) apologize fast
- Never throw her under the bus
- Remember you can’t read each other’s minds
- Focus on each other at least once a day by ditching your iPhones
- Know how to soothe your partner when she’s distressed
- Eat healthy food, exercise, and meditate together
- Use love (not threat or retaliation) to resolve conflict
- Do what you say you’ll do
- Show up for the tough stuff: funerals, medical procedures, illness
- Keep things fair
- Every day, tell your partner something about her that you’re grateful for
Now that you know 30 actions you can take to become the happiest couple you know, I encourage you to infuse them into your own relationship. Try doing them for a month and see if you don’t feel happier.
If you find that you’re feeling entirely too disconnected and hopeless about your relationship to even try to put these ideas into practice, then you probably need lesbian couples therapy. The counselors here at the Lesbian Couples Institute can help you save your relationship and be happy again. Get in touch with us today if you’d like to talk about how we can work together so that you can become a happy couple for good.
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